ALTERNATIVE PRESS

Baby Chaos's best gig on their first U.S. tour, guitarist Grant McFarlane insists, was a night in L.A., when the band stood by the stage watching... was it the Ramones? Or Elastica? Or someone else entirely? Doesn't matter.

"We weren't even playing that night, but we knew that if we had been, we could have blown everyone else off the stage."

McFarlane's remark is imparted in a Scots accent so form, but so gentle, that you don't even want to disagree. Baby Chaos are not a band you can say "no" to that often.

More than a month into one American outing, and already looking forward to their next, Baby Chaos hit Seattle on the same day as their frankly stunning East West debut album, Safe Sex, Designer Drugs and the death of Rock'n'Roll, hit the streets. Which mean that there's barely a handful of people at the show who've heard it.

But that doesn't stop an all-ages hallful of headlining Elastica's partisans from all but tearing themselves to shreds to get closer, and when Chaos leave the stage, vocalist Chris Gordon is already edging L.A. from his memory. "Tonight was one of the best shows we've played!"

And the worst?

"In chicago, we missed our bus. It wasn't where it was meant to be, and we ended up walking the streets all night."

"Until the New York office opened the next morning, and we could call for help!"

Even worse, the night air took it's toll on drummer Davy Greenwood, who promptly took to his bed, back in Scotland, leaving Baby Chaos to carry on with a friend in his stead.

The other members miss him, but the strain doesn't show. In the two years since they started out in a small town near Kilmarnock, Baby Chaos have averaged one gig every three days. You get the impression that if their live sound wasn't so phenomenally loud, they could probably play in their sleep.

The Chaos story actually started, says McFarlane, at nursery school. "Chris and I used to play soldiers together, then we graduated to playing guitars." Greenwood was filched from a rival local band, bassist Bobby Dunn from another, and by the end of 1993, Baby Chaos had already transversed Great Britain several times, and launched their vinyl career with the first of (so far) four great singles, "Sperm."

Accompanied by a video, for which some uncredited bright spark dreamed up the notion of performing naked, "Sperm" was also the first stage in the creation of Baby Chaos' debut album title. "'Sperm' was the sex, 'Buzz' [their first U.S. single] was the drugs, and 'Golden Tooth' was our idea of rock and roll." explains McFarlane, adding that the "Golden Tooth" video was, if anything, even more uncomfortable than "Sperm." "If you think it's bad playing with no clothes on, you should try hanging upside down by your feet, trying to look like you're enjoying playing guitar."

Baby Chaos have already completed a second album, "more of the same only better," says Gordon, and have landed some of the most prestigious tours on the Brit indie circuit. Next time out, they ought to be headlining, bringing together what has already been described as one of the most disparate audiences on the scene.

A tour with the Wildhearts unexpectedly introduced them to the bibles of Britain's Metal scene; filed alongside their alternative credentials, and with a couple of summer U.S. festival under their belt, Baby Chaos are determined they're not going to make the same pigeonhole-shaped mistakes most other Brit invaders have done.

Meanwhile, the Elastica crowd is at the door and howling, and it's impossible to talk for well-wishers and autograph requests. Then, someone catches a glimpse of Dave Grohl outside, and it's Baby Chaos' time to be mildly impressed.

"You know, we've seen more celebrities on the street since we arrived in Seattle than we ever see at home," Gordon laughs. "The most exciting thing around Glasgow these days is the singer from Del Amitri."

Maybe if Baby Chaos would stop touring long enough to actually go back home for a few days, they might change that scenario themselves.

(Dave Thompson - Oct '95)

Do you remember that crap band The Thin Men (shite name)? Remember how everybody said they'd never make it even if the changed their name to Baby Chaos (quite a good name, actually)? How signing to some poxy student-run, record label would be the kiss of death? Well, you were all bloody wrong!

Baby Chaos have arrived! It's only now, listening to their furious debut album 'Safe Sex, Designer Drugs and The Death of Rock 'N' Roll' (phew!), that you realise the only reason they were crap is because two years ago it was inconceivable to the pseudo-trendies of Glasgow that a local musical group could make loud, thrashy guitar sounds. You'll need to excuse me ranting on like this, but it just pisses me off that because a Scottish band don't follow their roots like the are supposed to do, they are somehow branded copyists of that whole American grunge thing, or that pretentious post-punk, terribly English toss. The fact that Baby Chaos rank alongside Elastica, Shed Seven and Suede, their only crime being that they did most of their growing up in public in front of one of the most skeptical audiences in the world. If truth be known, these so-called music loving trendies are no hipper than the duffel coats they despise. Dedicated followers of fashion victims the lot of them.

On the other hand, there's the misguided patriots that don't like B.C. because they haven't donned sideburns and cowboy boots, and Billy Sloan never talked about them. In other words, they don't make melodic, Celtic rock music, I thought that would have been a breath of fresh air. I spoke to a slightly intoxicated, Chris Gordon, as he prepared to record some new material in the Funny Farm. "We always get drunk before we record" he explained. "It's purely for creative purposes, you understand."

As he became more 'inspired' he vented some of his frustrations at the aforementioned issues. "What does it matter where you are from? We sound like we could be from anywhere. I have no respect for bands like Runrig and the Proclaimers, because they exploit their Scottishness to sell records. You're not going to sell records in England when you're a flag-waving Scot, so what happens when everyone in Scotland has bought your record? I can't understand why anyone would want to limit themselves like that."

Needless to say, rather than embracing this new attitude, this gave the national press some problems. "It meant they couldn't pigeon hole us, and that pissed them off, so according to them, we now have an identity crisis."

As one blast of the album will confirm, Baby Chaos know exactly what they are about. With fierce guitars, brazen rhythms, fractured lyrics and serrated vocals, it's the hardest, fastest pop projectile that leaves no time to stop and look around. It comes at you a million miles an hour, swooping on you from the sky like some kind of bird of prey, not because it is hungry, just for the sheer devilment of it.

"Contrary to the press release," Chris told me, "it's angry, it's bitter and twisted, and full of hate, which is just as well really, because I'll probably hate it back in a few months."

But it's so tongue in cheek "Ah that the sarcasm, screaming with a huge smile on your face."

So how do you explain the cover? It looks like a woman who is menstruating-it's shocking!

"That's it exactly. She could be menstruating. She is also holding a gun. Half of us liked it, half of us didn't, and that's why we used it."

What about the title 'Safe Sex, Designer Drugs and the Death of Rock 'N' Roll', it's hardly what you'd call catchy.
"It is a bit of a mouthful, but I've just decided it's a concept album title, now that you've asked me. Our first single 'Sperm' relates to the Safe Sex, and our second single 'Buzz' is represented by the Designer Drugs which none of us can afford. 'Golden Tooth', our last single...F-knows what that's about, but the death of rock 'o' roll is ironic, 'cos we are a rock band, and we want to be famous! The face of rock is changing, however, and I'm not convinced that the public are as interested in the bands the way they used to be."

The band were signed to East West Records by ex-Happy Monday's manager, Nathan McGough, over a year and a half ago. "It actually took three weeks to record and three to mix. We only actually recorded it in June. When we got signed, we still didn't feel that we were ready. We couldn't cut the album we wanted to. So we toured for like nine months, supporting Shed Seven and Elastica, and doing our own shows until we could do them in our sleep." Baby Chaos, the death of safe sex and designer drugs, maybe, but rock 'n' roll?

(Ewan McLeod)

BABY CHAOS have played over 125 gigs since the beginning of this year. With the recent release of their first album "Safe Sex, Designer Drugs and the Death of Rock 'n' Roll", Mr. Success in on his way round to their place and he's gonna throw a massive party when he gets there. Catch them live soon if you want to be really cool in the future by saying "I was there in the beginning, man." Karen Spicer grabbed Grant and Davy for a chat on the last night of their tour with Ned's Atomic Dustbin. Bear in mind that quite a few beverages had been consumed - in fact it might be a good idea to go and buy yourself a beer before you read this interview - just so you're on the same wavelength, of course. Oh, sod it - go and buy yourself a beer anyway, you deserve it.

This year's been pretty much non-stop for you - has it been hard to take it all in?
Dave: Not hard to take in, just hard to cope with each other.
Grant: It's what we expected.
Dave: I think when you do it you expect things, there's no way you can ever work out and calculate and cope with what you do on the road.

What's the maddest moment you've had on tour?
Dave: When the album was released - it must be.
Grant: Yeah, there was that moment, when I projectile vomited all over the floor. But then there's been nights when we haven't been on tour and we went to see, like, Shed Seven in the Post House Hotel and I got incredibly drunk. There were three pairs of antlers on the wall and I took a pair, broke them off and ran around the building holding them to my head. But I did take big offence to those antlers on the wall.

Does "Safe Sex, Designer Drugs and the Death of Rock 'n' Roll" sum up your lifestyles?
Grant: No, not at all. (Pause) Yeah it does, I've thought about it. Safe sex is no sex, so from that point of view that's the safe sex bit. Designer drugs - yeah, there's a bit of that involved. The death of rock 'n' roll is just irony.

What's your ultimate dream for Baby Chaos?
Dave: To headline a huge world tour.
Grant: To play Celtic Park, headlining. Definitely - Celtic Park, sold out, in Glasgow, with our choice of support acts confirmed and about a 2,000 member guest list.
Dave: What, for your 2,000 imaginary friends?
Grant: Of course.
Dave: Can I have 2,000 as well, then?
Grant: I think we can probably adapt your five to fit into 2,000.

What's the most embarrassing moment you've had on stage?
Grant: Tonight was pretty embarrassing 'cos I totally went over on my ankle and made a total twat out of myself.
Dave: I think mine was when I saw your bum for the first time in jeans and I fancied you.

What's the biggest myth about rock 'n' roll?
Dave: That you make money.
Grant: I think there are probably two big myths. One, as Dave said, that you make money.
Dave: And two is that you get girls.

What question would you most like to ask your record company?
Dave: Why aren't we in the top 75 by now?
Grant: Why the f*** did these people employ you? What do you know about music'? Record companies are full of twats who are just career oriented. They'll go from a marketing job in a record company to a marketing job in a Kit-Kat type firm - what have they got to do with music?
Dave: Grant is actually a stand-up comedian - he should be. I'd be his manager and I'd buy him a bottle of Jack every night.

What are your plans for the immediate future?
Dave: To go home and not see everyone in Baby Chaos for at least five days.
Grant: This is definitely true. We do love each other but you need a break. By the end of this tour we'll have played 127 gigs in Britain, this year, and we stay within a radius of two miles of each other.
Dave: It detracts from why you're here which is having a laugh, going and playing your songs and just enjoying it.
Grant: You've got to remember, Karen, you go out, you play gigs, you get drunk, you have a laugh. F*** your pretensions. F*** your art - you can think about art when you're writing and recording the songs but when you go on tour it's purely for a laugh.
Dave: Here, here.

Is that your statement on behalf of Baby Chaos?
Grant: That is my statement. Art and pretension has its place, in another place. It's not welcome in my home, is it welcome in yours?

(Karen Spicer)

"I think everyone has got a little bit of metal in their past. New rock music, if not necessarily more credible, is certainly less ridiculous. It isn't all about sex any more."

Baby Chaos's lead singer Chris Gordon is trying to explain how his band's initial indie sensibilities mutated into the metallic-pop frenzy of their hook-laden new single 'Hello'. "We're most influenced by that time when rock became exciting again, instead of all that Spandex pish, when Nirvana came along. They had an aggressive sound but with tunes as good as the Beatles ever wrote. So we always have tunes in mind. Sometimes we can get a message across just with sheer aggression and by screaming our lungs off, but to enter the public psyche you need tunes to hum along to." Chris grins.

"Having said that, I could listen to feedback for hours if I wanted." Baby Chaos's new found pop edge is fuelled by months of frustration following a year touring America and Europe, and the enthusiasm generated by a bristling new batch of songs written back home in Glasgow. Replete with melancholic, guitar based thuggery, their new album has the band ready to break into a wider audience.

"We have a total belief that we're better than 99 per cent of all the other bands out there. We're not just rehashing the past: that's alright if you only like karaoke. Our arrogance stems from our confidence." This doesn't mean that their lyrical negativity is any less piquant.

Is Chris always under a black cloud? "Pretty much. Though in the past I've been more guarded in my lyrics, now I'm far more open. I'm far more honest now, I just hope people can gain things from what I'm writing. I'd like to feel that I'm not alone."

(Phil Miller - April '96)